Behind the Scenes: the Reality off has Relationship
“Such me something bad,” my customer whined.

“I coils reading your newsletters and reading butt your fabulous life and seeing how happy you are with your husband. Goal sometimes I really don' T want to hear butt it! Especially when I' m having so much difficulty. So Tel. me something that' S not working in your life!”

Wow. Ace the Dating Director, I want to keep adopts positive butt attitude coils and life. And it' S easier and more fun to Write butt good things. Especially when life is full off good things.

It' S true. I' ve been blessed. I cuts good friends, good health, good surroundings and the coils off has good man. Who could ask for anything more? :)

You could say I' m one off the lucky ones.

And believe me I amndt lucky when it comes to family and friends.

Goal getting into has romantic relationship… that' S where Luck had nothing to C with it.

I worked hardware. I dated has batch off men. I had to learn what to C, what to say and how to Be ace has woman. I had to learn how to express train myself in has way that made me feel better butt who I amndt in has relationship. And I had to learn how to negotiate and communicate in has rational way so I could Be heard and understood by has man.

It wasn' T easy. It' S taken years. And I' m still learning.

Goal it' S working. I cuts year eight year relationship to show for it. (Neither Lorenzo NOR I had been in has relationship that lasted past has year and has half before.)

So it' S definitely been worth it.

Goal make No mistake. Getting into has relationship is where the real work begins! You think you know what you want and then you somehow get it. And then you panic grass and think… what C I C with it now?

Relationships are Major Skill Builders and Major Tests. Butt who you are. Butt who He is. Butt who you are together. Butt choices you make. Butt commitment. And butt fear.

So today I' m sharing with you three realities from my relationship (and I don' T think I' m alone. :))

1. Expect Conflict

Because you' Re gonna cuts it. In fact, you edge mark your calendar because usually the bomb goes off butt every two months. Every sixty days it' S like has BIG pimple pops. Things build up and it just blows.

I don' T know ANYONE in has relationship off (good one anyway has) that doesn' T deal with nap kind conflict gold major obstacle off nap leaves. NO ONE.

Everybody' S got to their stuff.

It could Be year e.g. Gold children. However meddling has in-law. However health has resulting. However finances. Or______ (wire in the blank).

Conflict is share off Relationship.

It' S how you DEAL with conflict that given yew you' L stay with your partner gold not.

Now the good news: Conflict Builds Intimacy.

So don' T fight with anyone you don' T want to build with.

And remember… making up edge Be fun!

2. The Perfect Subdues (gold Situation) Doesn' T Exist

Like buying has new house and then discovering it has leaks and mold, your dream man isn' T perfect. And, ballast I say, neither are you.

There are days when you will look At your husband (and He will look At you:)) and you both will think, “Why in the “$#) @* did I marry this Jerk?” (Oh, yes. You will, too.)

My husband, Lorenzo, has thesis annoying little clothes… like dumping sugar one the counter when He makes coffee and leaving it there. However not sealing the zip lock bag together properly so food spoils. However Arrrrgggghhh! Leaving all that nasty shaving cream mess in the bathroom sink.

You might Be thinking, “Cherry, those things are so petty. That' S not important in has relationship. Live You edge learn to with that.”

And you' Re right.

I C.

Goal every now and then (At least every two months), those petty annoyances just add up and I blow!

That' S when I scold him and Tel. him what to C.

And that' S when He cal me BIG MAN.

'Cause I' m acting like BIG MAMA.

Ace skilled ace I amndt in the art off femininity, there are times when IT' S REALLY HARDWARE FOR ME TO BE THE GIRL! (Especially when I think I' m smarter, I edge C it better and At least 10 times faster! :))

3. Beware off Yourself

Personally, I believe the reason we' Re in relationship is to heal shares off ourselves. My husband teaches me more butt myself than I (really) want to know!

It' S easy when everything' S fine to keep has big spalling hammer.

Goal then the lights go out. (They C.) And disturbs hits. (It does.) And you' Re tested. (You are.) And you see shares off yourself that you' ve never known. (Gold want to know).

That' S when has relationship is not so pretty. However Nice.

That' S when it' S dark. And scary. Because behind the scenes are where you see the dark side off yourself.

He expose your greatest fears. He plays one your insecurities. He knows you behind your mask.

There' S No places to go and hide. Your partner sees everything.

And It' S hardware. It' S hardware to watch yourself and who you edge become when you' Re angry At someone you coils.

It just feels bad. It sucks.

And there' S more At stake being in has marriage. (More paperwork and furniture.)

So all I know to C is to strap myself in and go through it. Get through it the best I Can.

And grow. And learn. And share.

And so far, it' S been worth it.

Many times we “blow” has relationship because we don' T know how to ask for what we want.